Many millenia ago, there lived a grouchy old Queen and her lovely young daughter, the Princess. Together they ruled the Kingdom of Ghettoville and were quite happy. But as the Princess grew older, her thoughts turned to the sweetness of love....and the Queen was happy.
Until the Princess brought home her first suitor, Sir Spoiled-A-Lot. Now, Sir Spoiled-A-Lot was bearable most of the time....but little tiny idiosyncrasies in the behavior of this Princess and her Sir slowly began to drive the Queen to insanity.
First of all, Sir Spoiled-A-Lot made it clear many times, in many different ways, that he had no respect for his noble elders. And the Princess made it clear that all her loyalties had shifted to Sir Spoiled-A-Lot and even mounted a short-lived rebellion against the Queen...with Sir Spoiled-A-Lot's complete support. Had it not been for the tactful interventions of some of the Knights of the Round Table, the Queen may have well ended up beheaded. The Queen was very sad and depressed but held a firm reign on her kingdom and did not hesitate to banish the two to other kingdoms for periods of time so they'd leave her the hell alone for awhile.
Things eventually cooled down between the crotchety Queen and the arrogant couple, but the Queen began to notice behaviors that were very queer, indeed. One day Sir Spoiled-A-Lot and the Princess were hanging around the Castle playing video games, when the Princess daintily excused herself to exercise her toilette in the lavatorie. Sir Spoiled-A-Lot, who for some reason is very uncomfortable unless the Princess is beside him every moment, heads to the lavatorie after about 5 minutes.
TAP TAP TAP. Princess: Yea M'Lord? Sir S-A-L: Whatcha doin? Princess: Well......um...... The Queen (butting in) : SHE'S TAKING A ROYAL POOP! NOW MOVE ALONG AND LET THE YOUNG LADY FINISH HER BUSINESS!
The Queen was very disturbed that Sir-Spoiled-A-Lot wasn't even willing to allow the poor Princess some poop time alone. Then the Queen later became extra-alarmed when, after the Royal Tutoring Sessions had ended for the season, that she suddenly seemed to be unable to gather a few minutes alone with the Princess just to chat. She even called the Princess down to the pet dragon's lair just to discuss how very cute the dragon was acting lately....and hopefully catch a few moments alone.....but Sir-Spoiled-A-Lot followed right behind them.
The Queen was beside herself and unsure how to handle the situation. She realized that her Princess couldn't be her baby Princess forever...should she back off and hope the Princess would seek her out eventually? Should she banish Sir-Spoiled-A-Lot and risk the wrath of an uprising?
Eventually the Queen issued a Royal Proclamation Blog to get the opinions of the kindgdom. And they replied.........
