Monday, February 06, 2006
THE SAGA OF RED
And now, its time for another Queen O' The Bitches Proclamation!!!!
(Rings bell) Hear ye, hear ye!
Just because it comes in the email and it tugs at your heartstrings or it promises you free money and/or food, this does not mean it is real!
I repeat: IT DOESN'T MEAN IT IS REAL!!!!!
You already know all the ones I'm talking about......Bill Gates sending you money (that bitch OWES me), getting a free meal at Red Lobster or wherever, shopping sprees, cookie recipes (haven't seen that one in awhile, come to think of it), Viagra samples, WHATEVER.
Because I am sure all of you out there already know you're not going to get money for free or ANYTHING free for that matter. Right? Word.
But the following one drives me absolutely nuts. I have had this one so many times its not even funny. Here she is:
"Red", The Amber Alert Child
I am the one who nicknamed her "Red", for obvious reasons. She looks like the little girl from the Walton's....I'm pretty sure its actually her! This child has appeared in my inbox at least 35 or more times since....oh, probably 1996. Whenever I get an email and its titled "Amber Alert", I'm like...."Oh NO, not Red again!" and its always Red. They don't even bother getting a new child. According to Snopes.com, the internet urban legend buster, no one even knows who this kid really is. And if she were real, this would be longest Amber Alert in the history of mankind. Let's face it, Red probably grew up in the Midwest and is now an elementary school teacher who is pregnant and trying to buy a split-level home with her hubby. Red is NOT MISSING.
Please folks, click on the link above for Snopes.com and acquaint yourselves with internet hoaxes. The folks in your address book will thank you for it.
Posted by firstname.lastname@example.org @ 8:50 AM