Monday, January 10, 2005
WHICH PATH ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE?
I saw my ex-sister-in-law (hereafter to be known by the name "Silly") and another girl hitch-hiking today and I stopped to pick them up. I didn't ask where they'd been and they didn't volunteer any information. Both of them were in pretty bad shape and had absolutely nothing or any money to get anything. Silly was sporting a wrist brace....somehow she broke her wrist and hasn't gone to get it fixed. The first thing she asked me for was a tampon. She actually got her period for the first time in 2 years because she hasn't been on any crack in awhile and has unbelievably gained a few pounds.
Here is a picture I drew of what she looked like today.
They were hungry, thirsty and dirty. They needed a trip to the store bad. So we went to the grocery store and I got them cigarettes, a lighter, a couple of Pepsi's, a couple of Stouffers, a loaf of bread, tampons, toilet paper and soap. All they needed then was a ride home....which turned out to not be in town. So I rode them all the way out to the Middle of Nowhere. When we got there we had to turn into a random dirt driveway that was filled with potholes. Well, they technically weren't potholes, they were small lakes. Somehow I maneuvered through there and we came upon a shitty half-falling-down house with trash and car parts strewn everywhere in the yard. There were a bunch of rough teenagers hanging around outside and some mean looking dogs. Silly wanted to show me where she was living so I parked the car and made damn sure the doors were locked.
No this isn't the actual house...but it is a reasonable facsimile.
It turns out she wasn't living in that dreaded house. We followed a short trail through the woods that was marked by a string of at least 15 drop-cords until we came upon a dirty little camper. She's living in the woods with her boyfriend in a camper that's at least 20 to 25 years old with no running water and electricity that is diluted through 15 or more drop-cords. Her boyfriend is scary too, he's friendly enough but he can't stay still. I'm not sure if its drugs or if he has some kind of central nervous system problem.
Once again, not the actual camper...but its very close. This one is in good shape compared to theirs.
I couldn't wait to get the living hell out of there. I told Silly I had to go, it was a long drive back and I had to go get groceries and do laundry. Then she starts trying to give me some pills to "pay me back" but I just said no that's okay. She walked back to the car with me and I saw two of the teenagers backing away from my car as we came back to the main house. I guess they were looking to see what kinds of things were in the car. Good-bye. Later. Adios. Silly hugs me, tells me she loves me, starts crying and says to tell Sparkle how much she loves her.
I just cried on the way home and thanked God I had made better choices in my life. I don't have much money. Sparkle and I don't always have every single thing we need. I definitely consider us to be lower middle class in the Grand Hierarchy Caste System of The World, but at least we have a decent life. I have a job, I have a house and car. Yeah, the house and car are Ghetto but we're making it. We have clothes, they might be worn but they are never dirty. There's some food in the fridge. We have a computer, TV, books, a shitload of CDs and are able to keep warm. I would put myself in the 85th percentile regarding happiness. I can wake up in the morning and plan my day around what I need to accomplish instead of my whole life revolving around how to get more drugs so I won't get sick.
Where would Silly and that other girl have ended up today if our paths hadn't crossed? It helps to remind myself that Silly has CHOSEN to live this way. Her parents are good well-to-do people. They gave their kids everything. Silly has had a good education and even went to college. She was a beautiful girl at one time. She's had everything life has to offer and still chose a different path. Becoming addicted to drugs could happen to anyone, but she has had every opportunity in the world to clean up....rehab a couple of times, the methadone program, even jail but she chooses to remain in the state she's in.
So what's my point? Clear and simple....don't do drugs, kids. And if you are going to do drugs anyway, just try to keep it limited to occasional use. You cannot stay high 24/7 or you're headed for trouble, more trouble than you've ever dreamed. You don't want to end up in a shitty camper in the woods without the necessities of life and totally unemployable. In fact, I can only thing of one other person whose life is that out of control.....
Posted by firstname.lastname@example.org @ 2:12 AM